PERKS OF BEING SINGLE

[sorry for some foul words here]

 SHOUT OUT TO ALL SINGLE LADIES OUT THERE!!!!!!!!!!!

#TeamSingle

#BoysFree

Many people would say being single is sad and depressing. No boys in life. No sex life. No inspiration. No other fucking shit to mention. 

Hell no!!!! Not for us! Who says you need guys in life to fulfill your happiness? Maybe for desire... but... So here are 5 Perks of Being Single.

1. You are INDEPENDENT. 

Technically yes, you are single and you are free!!!! You can decide on your own without a guy opposing on your own thinking and perspectives in life; saying "don't do this, don't do that". You can do whatever you want. You can wear whatever clothes you are comfortable with. You can go anywhere without someone you have to update with. You are on your own. It's just so sad seeing a friend who has to always ask for permission and giving updates to his/her partner. See!!! If you are single, there are no limitations. You can do whatever fucking shit you want in life because you know that you are the boss of your own!

2. Your time is EXTENSIVE.

If you are in a relationship, most of your time is always focused on your guy. You also tend to forget your other priorities. Sometimes you even set aside your family and friends. But hey!!!!! Before you met that guy, who you are with? Okay, if you are single, you all have the time to do anything. You don't have to wake up at 12:00am just to greet happy monthsary/ anniversary/ or any whatever fucksary. You can go home late without someone getting mad at you (of course your parents will do). If you are single, you don't have to worry about giving time to one particular person only because you already know how to manage and you can always share time to anyone.

3. You can MINGLE. 

You are single and always ready to mingle bitch!

You can meet and enjoy all types of men in town. You can go to club, bars, party all night, meet different kinds of people; especially meeting those fucking hot guys. But if you are in a relationship, your eyes are only limited to one area. Ohhhh sad life. Unlike when you are single, your eyes can go round 360 degrees and wait for it! There's more! You can even talk with them. Your eyes, your hands, your body are not just limited to one thing. If you know what I mean (smirk). Flirting is permitted.

4. NO PRESSURE at all. 

You don't have to deal with any people related to him especially his family and friends. You don't have to act as fucking nice infront of them. You don't have to act as someone you are not. You don't act just to be liked by them or just to impress. Unlike being single, you have no worries. You meet your friends' family and make their home as if your second home. You don't fucking adjust for others. Also, you don't have to compromise to anyone. 

5. You can achieve your SQUAD GOALS.

I guess, this is the most important thing of all. Yes! personally speaking, this is the top most problem of every friendship. When you are in a relationship, you tend to forget your friends. Oh c'mon!!!! I know you did. It happened even for once. Whenever your friends invite you to hangout or to go somewhere with them, most of the time you are already thinking twice. 

Hell yeaaaaaah!!! Compare when you were still single, you go instantly. You always have time to your friends but now that you are in a relationship, you are now focused on your guy and on his thing. If you are single, you enjoy every moment with your friends and you're going to realize how happily contented you are with your friends; that no boys or no any single guy could ever give you those precious moments. With your friends, you can always act and do lots of crazy things.  

Being in a relation(shit) is not bad. But of course, being single is better. I know it is fun to be with the person you love but duhhh!

Are you ready for commitment? 

Are you ready to get tied on one person?

Are you ready to settle in?

Are you ready to manage your time between family, friends, and your guy? 

If NO, then what the hell are you thinking!!! If you are still young, then I guess this isn't the right time yet to get focused on one person. But if you can balance your time, then go ahead! 

Enjoy life! 

You only live once. 

There is a time for everything! For now enjoy the company because I believe sooner or later you will meet the right one for you. Ewww another hopeless romantic words. But seriously, 

JUST GO WITH THE FLOW. ENJOY LIFE BECAUSE YOU MIGHT MISSED A LOT OF OPPORTUNITIES :) MAYBE FROM YOUR EXPERIENCES YOU'LL LEARN A LOT, THAT CAN BE USED TO ESTABLISH BETTER AND SUCCESSFUL RELATIONSHIP IN THE FUTURE :)

You know yourself. I believe you know what you want in life. 





ANOTHER SINGLE BITCH,
- SLENUJ

IT IS NEVER TOO LATE!

 

It is never too late to FORGIVE....

How hard it is to forgive? But how easy it is to ask forgiveness? At some point in life, I believe it is never easy to forgive especially if that particular person has given you so much pain. Is it really the pain that cause you not to forgive? Or is it your pride that tries to control you? YOU HAVE TO FORGIVE NOT BECAUSE THEY DESERVE FORGIVENESS BUT RATHER YOU DESERVE PEACE.

It is never too late to ACCEPT....

To forget is never easy. We can forget someone's name but never the memory that you both created. To forget is never an escape to any problem you have. Sometimes you just have to accept things in life and later on you will realize, the impact would be less and gradually you will say "It is nothing". There are missed opportunities and good things because we chose to focus on the past. We have been a prisoner of the past. Change your view and learn to accept things in life. SOMETIMES, ACCEPTANCE IS THE ANSWER TO EVERYTHING.

It is never to late to GIVE....

You give not because you have everything. You give because you know the feeling of nothing. Giving doesn't mean you have to give everything. Sometimes, it means you give something for other people to feel like everything. Anyone can give. It doesn't limit to those who have everything because sometimes those who have everything are still poor when it comes to their spirit. NO ONE HAS EVER BECOME POOR FROM GIVING.

It is never too late to SAY NO....

There are things in life that has limitations. Actually, everything has it's limitation. You cannot just go with the flow. Sometimes, you have to think first before you do any actions in life. One move may lead you to failure or one move may lead you to success. Sometimes, by saying no to one thing will change everything. Saying no doesn't mean you are not courageous enough but rather, saying no proves that you are strong enough to LET GO OF THINGS AND BE OPEN TO SOMETHING BETTER.

It is never too late to LOVE....

When was the last time you really mean to say I love you? Nowadays, this 3 magical words already became as part of an expression. The passion and essence of it becomes just an ordinary one. When was the last time you say I love you to your mom, dad, sister, brother, or friends? Saying these 3 words doesn't require you to explain further because THESE CAN ALREADY EXPLAIN EVERYTHING. Sometimes love is the solution to anything.

It is never too late to SAY SORRY....

When was the last time you say sorry? Saying sorry doesn't mean you are accepting your defeat but rather it shows humility that no matter what happens, you are willing to sacrifice your pride. SAYING SORRY SOMETIMES BINDS PEOPLE TOGETHER. Sometimes it is a solution to any fights. According to a book, "it is humility that makes men angels; it was pride that changed men to devils." 

It is never to late to SAY THANK YOU....

Everyday, we receive a lot! But have you ever say thank you? Are you the kind of person who is fond of receiving different things? Always keep in mind, that sometimes you have to say thank you and it will really mean a lot for that person. Saying thank you doesn't mean you have to return the favor.

It is never too late to PRAY....

When was the last time you pray? Praying is creating private conversation with God. Why do you pray? To ask for grace? To ask for forgiveness? To ask God for anything? It is never too late to pray and just simply talk to God about what happened to you the whole day. God is the greatest among the best. He has better plans for you. Sometimes you just have to pray for it. 





- SLENUJ

10 Types of Friends

In our life, we all have different kinds of friends. Your circle of friends may be that diversed. Just because you or 6 or 8 in a group doesn't mean you are all close to each other because I believe there will always be "BEST OF FRIENDS" inside a group of BESTFRIENDS. So here are 10 Types of Friends that I believe you also have in life. 

1. The GIVER. The giver is usually the one who is so generous of all! He/she is someone you can depend on anything. The DEPENDABLE ONE! When you're hungry and ask for food, I'm pretty sure he/she has one. Whenever you need help on anything, you can always count on him/her. Sometimes these are your friends who can easily give and expect nothing in return. They give more than what is expected. 

2. The LIFTER. The lifter is usually the one who usually gives advises and the most optimistic friend you have. At some point of your life, you have this friend who never tired of listening to your endless and pointless dramas in life. Be glad!!! That friend is worth keeping! The lifter usually make you feel all right in their own little ways. They are the ones who would really cheer you up and make a great escape from your melancholy.

3. The OPPOSITE. At some point in your life, not all your friends will agree to you. The opposite is the one who usually disagree on you. You both have different perspective in life. This type of friend is the one you usually have fight with. But despite of this, this friend stays with you whenever you need him/her. Sometimes this is also the righteous one. But don't worry, they can be humble for some time :) They may have opposite thinking, but I believe, they just care for you!

4. The ADVENTURER. The adventurer friend is the one who usually want to try new things! They like adrenaline rush activities. They love to try new foods, new places, new rides, etc. In short they are the ones who will actually invite you to try new things in life. Be glad, this may help you achieve your bucketlist. Sometimes the adventurer always have your back. They love to sneak! But when you guys have both fucked up, that adventurer can actually save you. They will always be your partner in crime!!

5. The LIFE. The life of the group is usually the one who loves to laugh and throw some jokes. They give life to the group! They are the most loud friends you have. Whispering is never effective with them. They have the best stories or they always have stories with them. They are the most talkative ones. But without that kind of friend, your group will be boring. They like to talk about random things.

6. The ANNOYING-ONE. Okay, this may sound negative but we all that one friend who is so annoying but you cannot live without. They can be annoying for some point. Annoying because of the way they talk, they way they react, etc. But I'm pretty sure, despite of being annoying, you know that there is a good thing on them which is worth keeping.

7. The LAZY-ONE. The lazy one is simply that one friend who is so impatient. Whenever you ask them to join with you on some trip, they will always say "Nah.. I can't. I just want to sleep." This type of friend doesn't like to complicate things. One advantage of having a lazy friend is, they make your life easier. 

8. The NERD-ONE. We all have that one friend who is so studious! Yes, education is important. But this type of friend, they usually have their reviewers with them. Just for example, you guys are hanging out but they still bring their reviewers with them. One advantage of having them is, they are the most responsible friend you have! You can ask questions, they let you copy during quizzes, and they are the most logical person.

9. The FORGOTTEN-ONE. We have this one friend who doesn't usually hangout with you. They have lots of endless reasoning why they can't join. Sometimes, this became a reason why you guys can't easily invite them during hangout that's why most of the time, they are forgotten. But this doesn't make them less of a friend. This person is still your friend at some point.

10. The UNFORGETTABLE-ONE. We all have that one friend or two, who are really unforgettable! They have the most embarrassing stories that you can never get out of it. Those stories are always on fire! "Hey remember our friend who pooped on her undies?", "Hey! remember our friend who......". This unforgettable one may have embarrassing stories but when you remember them, you will somewhat smile. :) This friend will still make you smile because of the memories they have imparted to you.

No matter how many friends you have in life, I believe they are just a few who are really worth keeping; not just because they give a lot, they give the best stories, they are unforgettable, but rather YOU GUYS MAKE THE MOST OF EVERYTHING! THEY ARE WITH YOU DURING YOUR UP AND DOWN. THEY ARE WITH YOU DURING THE MOST EMBARRASSING TIME. Most especially, THEY NEVER FAILED TO MAKE YOU SMILE. Always keep in mind, FRIENDS ARE YOUR SECOND FAMILY.
They are your brothers or sisters by blood. But keep in mind, you have to know those people who are really worth keeping. You don't just keep friends because they make you happy or they are with you during the best times. Remember that you will really know your real and true friends during your nothing. 

LOVE versus INFATUATION

Everyone of us has given a capacity to love and be loved in return. 
Sometimes we mistakenly define infatuation as love or vice versa. Both are strange and indefinite emotion; both shows and manifests desire. We just have to be aware of the difference of these two. But how can we tell whether one's in love or simply infatuated?

Based on one article I have read, INFATUATION has been defined as the "emotional impulse of love". This usually comes first before you encounter the real love. On the other hand, LOVE is defined as the "strongest above all emotions". Nowadays, the distinction between the two is lost on youth.

So here I made 13 distinction of love and infatuation based on my own observation, learning, and personal experiences.


1. Love centers to one person but infatuation tends to be felt to different persons at the same time. 

You can only feel that real love to one person. If it happened that you both love them, then it's not love, it's infatuation. Because if you love one person, there will be no greater than him/her. You don't have to choose because at first love is not made to be an option.

2. Love develops slowly but infatuation is always at first sight. 

There is no such thing as love at first sight. Love is not like a thunder that will easily strike on you. It develops. It nurtures. Love generally develops over time. Feelings that develop over time often lead to genuine love and a long & lasting relationship. Infatuation on the other hand, comes instantly. Easily comes and easily go.

3. Love is affection but infatuation is lust. 

Love is passion. Love sees both inner and outer beauty of one person. It is an intense care and affection towards one person. Infatuation always stem from physical attractiveness. Love is a stronger feeling than infatuation. Just to remind you all, let love be always greater than lust. Love can always wait for the right time. It is more passionate and romantic if you have sex with the person you love and not just with the person you desire or simply one night stand. Love controls physical contact but infatuation explores it. Love takes time but infatuation is instant.

4. Love is unconditional but infatuation is delusional.
Love is everlasting. Love knows no limitation; love without condition. Love is something you see, you feel, you hear, and you believe. Just for an example, on online dating sites. You don't love a person you just met online because you don't know him or her better. You may know him/her based on their stories but it will never reveal their real personality. Infatuation, yes indeed, is delusional. We tend to believe on something unreal. Sometimes, we already know that it isn't real but we are still blinded by our feelings. Wake up! Don't be blinded by your feelings or emotions. Time to open your eyes and accept the reality.

5. Love is partnership but infatuation is one sided. 

Love stem from two strangers that gradually invest feelings and bonded by trust. Love is a give and take relationship. Love is never one sided. Love is partnership that brings out the best in each other. Infatuation is one sided. One sided love affair never works and never will. It is not openly reciprocated. Love is "US" while Infatuation is "I".

6. Love is acceptance but infatuation is disappointment. 

When you love, all the good and bad things are accepted. All the flaws are faced and accepted. Even during the most embarrassing situation, it never changed how much you love him/her. Nothing makes you love that particular person less. Infatuation comes along with disappointment. There is what you called "TURN OFF" because you suddenly lose interest about him/her. Maybe because you have seen the real them or there is something that made you dislike him/her.

7. Love is holistic but infatuation focuses mainly on one aspect. 

Love sees the inner and outer beauty of one person. When you love someone, you don't just love them because of their looks, their talents, etc. but rather you love everything about them. Infatuation on the other hand, you just like them because they are good looking. They have six pack abs. They are the hottest. They can fulfill your wants and desires. But real love will always fulfill your needs and dreams in your life.

8. Love is a real thing but infatuation is fairy tale.

You tend to compare one person on some fictional or romantic based movies. But no! We are all unique. Those are just man made characters. Love is real, IT IS SOMETHING REAL. It never comes from any most romantic movie you have ever seen. You both create your own stories and should never compare to any chick flicks. When you are infatuated, you tend to imagine things, things beyond reality! Wake up!!!!! You might missed to see the real love because of dreaming about the man or woman you want in life.

9. Love survives but infatuation glosses.

Love is something worth fighting for. It makes you survive to any odds that come into your way. It make you face the reality where in love never comes easy. But love makes you stronger. Infatuation on the other hand make you believe that everything's all right. But don't be stupid! Don't be blinded by your hopes. Infatuation makes you believe that it is magical and true but it isn't. Love conquers all.

10. Love produces security but infatuation, insecurity. 

Love makes you realize to be yourself, that you don't have to pretend as anyone just to make you feel good to your partner. Love is just simply standing in front of your partner wearing the most comfortable clothes you have and no make up at all. Love makes you not compare yourself to anyone but infatuation does. Infatuation makes you feel like everyday is competition; that you have to be at your best for your partner and that is why you feel insecure. Never compare yourself to anyone except from the previous you. 

11. Love motivates but infatuation distracts.

Love makes you feel a better person from yesterday. It inspires you. It motivates you. Love helps you to be better and not for the worse. When you are infatuated, you tend to forget other relevant things in your life. You have now your focus. Unlike love, it is extensive. Everything that is connected and related to your love is now relevant to you. 

12. Love is permanent but infatuation is temporary.

It is ironic because we all know that everything is temporary but love will always be love. It only differs on how we feel it and how you show it. Love is permanent. Once you are in loved, it will take a long time to forget someone but infatuation is temporary. You can easily get over with someone. Infatuation shows no progression with in a relationship. Everything is temporary in infatuation but love will always stay the same. 

13.  Love is selfless but infatuation is selfish.

Love is about giving. Love is not about expecting something in return. Love knows when to sacrifice or not. Love knows when to end. On the other hand, infatuation wants to you do things for your own happiness without thinking for the happiness of the other person. Infatuation makes you do things to feed up your fantasies and happiness; that you derive to any personal pleasure. Love is passion. Love is inspiration. Infatuation is all about possession and obsession.

At some point in our life, we tend to get infatuated several times before we find the real love.  Always remember, if we love, we use our heart but in making decision we use our mind. Don't let your decisions in life be driven by emotions. Sometimes, we fail due to the choices we made. So before you enter on something serious, always ask yourself if you are already ready to accept all flaws and consequences brought by the choice you made.

The next time you meet a person whom you like, don't worry if it's love or infatuation because I believe it will soon tell you. Just go with the flow. Enjoy life. Enjoy being in love or infatuated.

One thing that make love and infatuation similar is, they can both hurt you but not destroy you. Distraction is a choice but pain is inevitable. You just have to keep in mind, which is worth all the pain, if it's LOVE or INFATUATION?




- SLENUJ